A Skirt Is Not An Invitation
- Valerie Knight
- Feb 19, 2021
- 3 min read
Is wearing short skirts an open invitation for people to stare or make suggestive comments? Is wearing a low cut dress means we are 'asking for it'? Is a bold lipstick an invite for others? I don't think so! Since many decades women have been fighting this patriarchal stereotype where a women is called the culprit rather than a victim for wearing something which many consider 'inviting'. But is it really true? Is it alright to label a woman characterless and inviting because she wants to wear something which makes her feel confident in her own skin? Absolutely not!
It is outrageous to know that a woman is most of the times judged not on her personality but rather the clothes she choses to wear. Her character is defined by the length of her skirt, the neckline of her dress, the color of her lipstick etc by the society. Our patriarchal society have termed women as mere objects and not living beings which they really are. Why is it not okay for women to wear what they want to? Why are women judged and why is their character based on their clothes?
Whenever we see an independent woman wearing something which is not acceptable by the society, she is called bold and shameless by numerous people. Why is it that she can't have the right to wear the clothes which she wants to? Why is a girl told not to go 'out of the limits' while choosing fashion? Why do people raise fingers on women who wear low cut dresses or short skirts? Why are they called shameless for their choice of clothes. She didn't ask you all to stare, did she?
And then after all these comments and remarks, women are blamed for the bad deeds which are done to them. If a woman gets assaulted, they say, "Did you see how tight her clothes were? Of course men would be tempted to touch them. She was asking for it."
Is it really how you feel about assaults? That the girl was 'asking for it'? Its so saddening to see how patriarchy cloud people's mindset and push women down. There have been uncountable incidents where the woman was blamed for 'looking too sexy'. Men are never criticized for wearing only boxers in public whereas a women would be shamed if her bra strap was visible. Why does everyone expects women to cover themselves up and hide their body? Is that what patriarchy believes? That its the fault of the victim that she was looking hot?
Assaults happen not because of the clothing of women but rather the mentality of the assaulter. Then why is the woman blamed rather than the actual assaulter? The mentality that its the fault of women for wearing too 'inviting' clothes is based on the thinking that men cannot control themselves and thus women should hide themselves in order to feel safe. If that's true then men should not be let out of their house! They should be taught how to control themselves and not see women as just objects to please them.
The change is needed within our mindsets, not in the way of clothing. If rapes and assaults happened due to the revealing clothes of women, then those eight and nine year old girls won't be raped and assaulted, nor would girls wearing full clothes be stared wrongly at. If everyone decides to let go of this patriarchal mindset and cut the problem from its roots, then no woman would feel the need to cover herself up before leaving her house.
So dear patriarchal society, instead of teaching your daughters to cover herself up while going out and living in the fear of being assaulted, teach your sons to respect women and if he dares harass one, his family would not support his mistakes. And to those 'men' who claims they are keeping an eye on us? Please look away. Most of our problems would be solved as soon as you do that.
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